I am unbeautiful.
I am 35. I have been in and out of relationships. All of them, more painful than the previous. All of them made me feel like I was just an option. I am pretty. I am told so, and i believe i am not unattractive for sure. I am intelligent. I know i am. I am smart, i am talented. I love to travel. I give space. I don't question too much. I don't pester too much. I seek space. I am not nagging. I am not unforgiving. I am accomadating. I am adjusting. I don't talk a lot, but there are positive exceptions to this. I am independant. I can fix my own appliances. I am a good driver. I cook fairly well. I love cooking. I eat a lot. I am not fussy. I am fashionable. I am stylish. I have a unique sense of style. I am very individualistic. I am a loner, yet i love people. I love animals. I love movies. I am funny. I am extremely witty. I can mimic. I sing well. I talk blunt. I am adventurous. I travel alone. I have tattoos. I am slightly tomboyish, yet feminine when i need to be. I dance decently. I am strong physically.
Yet, i am single. There is not a single man on this planet who loves me for who i am. Not a single man who would want to accept me.
I don't want to be unloved! I want someone to love me wholly. I dont want to return to an empty home. Where no one is waiting for me. I want to be someone's first choice. I want someone to wake me up with a kiss. I want to wrap my arms around someone to go to sleep. If i stay awake i want to chat with someone all night. I want to walk holding hands. I want someone to hold me from behind when i am unaware. I want to put my head on his shoulder when another girl looks at him just to show he's mine. I want to travel with him. I want to watch movies. I want to watch sunrises and sunsets together. I want to not be talented, if that is a problem. I am fine being less talented than that someone. I will nag if that is going to fetch me love. I will harass, not adjust, be adamant, stubborn and argumentative. I will pester. I will keep calling and checking upon. Will leave no room to breathe if that helps. I will bang the car while i reverse. I will ruin electronics and pretend like i never even touched them! I will wear frills, flown gowns, paint my nails like every other girl. I will laugh at jokes after 2 hours or laugh non stop for 2 hours. I will go 'aaaaawwwwwww' when i see cute puppies. I will articulate. I will train to sing and dance. I won't get adventurous at all. I will hide my tattoos, unfortunately i can't undo them. I will behave frail. If only all this fetches me love.
I have not been complimented in ages. I have not been told how beautiful i am. I have not been reminded how i may be centre of someones world. Nobody finds me attractive? Nobody? Nobody feels i am worthy of their love? Not a single man that would want to spend some time with me... let alone a lifetime. I am everything a man seeks in his woman, yet i am single. What is not working for me? May be i am just.... unbeautiful.
I am 35. I have been in and out of relationships. All of them, more painful than the previous. All of them made me feel like I was just an option. I am pretty. I am told so, and i believe i am not unattractive for sure. I am intelligent. I know i am. I am smart, i am talented. I love to travel. I give space. I don't question too much. I don't pester too much. I seek space. I am not nagging. I am not unforgiving. I am accomadating. I am adjusting. I don't talk a lot, but there are positive exceptions to this. I am independant. I can fix my own appliances. I am a good driver. I cook fairly well. I love cooking. I eat a lot. I am not fussy. I am fashionable. I am stylish. I have a unique sense of style. I am very individualistic. I am a loner, yet i love people. I love animals. I love movies. I am funny. I am extremely witty. I can mimic. I sing well. I talk blunt. I am adventurous. I travel alone. I have tattoos. I am slightly tomboyish, yet feminine when i need to be. I dance decently. I am strong physically.
Yet, i am single. There is not a single man on this planet who loves me for who i am. Not a single man who would want to accept me.
I don't want to be unloved! I want someone to love me wholly. I dont want to return to an empty home. Where no one is waiting for me. I want to be someone's first choice. I want someone to wake me up with a kiss. I want to wrap my arms around someone to go to sleep. If i stay awake i want to chat with someone all night. I want to walk holding hands. I want someone to hold me from behind when i am unaware. I want to put my head on his shoulder when another girl looks at him just to show he's mine. I want to travel with him. I want to watch movies. I want to watch sunrises and sunsets together. I want to not be talented, if that is a problem. I am fine being less talented than that someone. I will nag if that is going to fetch me love. I will harass, not adjust, be adamant, stubborn and argumentative. I will pester. I will keep calling and checking upon. Will leave no room to breathe if that helps. I will bang the car while i reverse. I will ruin electronics and pretend like i never even touched them! I will wear frills, flown gowns, paint my nails like every other girl. I will laugh at jokes after 2 hours or laugh non stop for 2 hours. I will go 'aaaaawwwwwww' when i see cute puppies. I will articulate. I will train to sing and dance. I won't get adventurous at all. I will hide my tattoos, unfortunately i can't undo them. I will behave frail. If only all this fetches me love.
I have not been complimented in ages. I have not been told how beautiful i am. I have not been reminded how i may be centre of someones world. Nobody finds me attractive? Nobody? Nobody feels i am worthy of their love? Not a single man that would want to spend some time with me... let alone a lifetime. I am everything a man seeks in his woman, yet i am single. What is not working for me? May be i am just.... unbeautiful.
