Friday, May 29, 2009

Lonely again


In the window she sits with her feet held close to her chest, holding them in her arms. The silence in the room is echoing in her head and is driving her crazy. She could hear the calm breeze blowing in her ears. Her hair falling limp on her face. Her eyes constantly gazing at eternity from the grills of the window. Her hair bothering her but she is undeterred. A warm drop of tear rolls down from her right eye ceases on its way down. She winces and wheezes. The sound breaks the silence as though the breeze suddenly stopped where it was and the hair fell limp again wherever they could place themselves on her face. Another drop of tear cascades from her left eye followed by a tear from the right. She scrambles herself quickly as her arms lose the grip of her feet that slide away inadvertently. She bit her lips as her heart squirmed and she lays her head on the feet and burst out crying. She lifts her face, that had turned red and her eyes had become sore upon crying, her dress had soaked up all the tears she shed and left a wet blob mark behind. The pace of her tears had slowed and she continued to caterwaul. Her hair were soaked in the tears she shed and they stuck around her cheek and lips stopping and diverting the tears. She tucked a bunch behind her ears and wiped her watering nose with the back of her hand. Suddenly the breeze echoed again in her ears and she realised she was lonely again.

If you were my woman...

Listen Mototo, you better treat this lady like a queen. Because you my friend, you found yourself the perfect woman.
If I was ever so lucky to find the perfect woman, I’d give her flowers everyday and not just any flower. Ok!
Her favorites are orchids, White.
And breakfast in be
d. Six loaves of wheat toast, butter on both sides. No crust, the way she likes it.
I’d be her shoulder to cry on and her best friend and I’d spend every day trying to think of how to maker her laugh. She has the most amazing laugh. That’s what I’d do, if I were you.


- Melman, Madagascar II - Escape to Africa

If you were him, what would you do for you love?

Saturday, May 23, 2009

It's Only Words...

Words don’t fascinate me. Floral ornamented lines don’t sweep me. Strangely some lines have stuck in my head like glue and haunt me every now and then. Some words become synonymous with people and some words come together beautifully to construct a line. These lines even sans music sound like music to the ears. These lines go so deep down in the heart that they refuse to leave. These lines become your emotions. You cry when they make you cry you laugh when they want you to… Lines that you instantly recognize with when they come any close to what you feel at that moment. So I find it funny when so often we get hooked to sad songs after a heart break! Or often find the most romantic love song when we are in love.

I am not a genre person. I love music. Any music. Music that music to me at that time. If I like rock today, not necessary that I will like it tomorrow. My song choices are fluid. I hated Glen Medeiros ‘ Nothings gonna change shit’ as I grew up, will always hate it. Too candy floss for me… hollow lyrics… he doesn’t mean what he says obviously. Nobody loves forever. So these lyrics don’t hold any ground for me. I hated “last Christmas’ gooeeeeeyyyyyy! Yuck! Made me diabetic it was so sweet!

Not to deviate from my basic intention of writing today – Song lyrics that swept me off the floor.

  1. Main Zindagi Ka Sath Nibhata Chala Gaya – this song never fails to amuse me. Just so aptly describes how life should be taken easy!

  1. Love to see you cry – I love the video on the whole. I never get bored of this song. The line particularly that kills me is : you don’t know how much it hurts when you fall asleep in my arms.

  1. Tere Bina Jiya Jaaye Na – all who know me well know I looooooooooove this song. Something about it… particularly the line ‘Jab bhi khayalon mein tu aaye, mere badan se khushboo aaye’ is so subtly suggestive! Gulzar is a genius, I bow to his genius.

  1. Din pyar ke aayenge – this song os from Sawerewali Gadi. Poonam Dhillon flirtatiously and blithe fully running behind a train. This song is just HAPPY under my scanner. No frilly lyrics, just simply happy.

  1. Insatiable – Darren Hayes has perhaps redeemed his foolish candy floss career with this one song. Sensuous, sultry and sexy this song is experienced best with lights off in a dark room on loudspeakers. ‘ I fall asleep inside of you, there are no words there's only truth’.

  1. Eminem – I cannot pick one song of this man who writes what I feel in my heart. I so totally relate to all his song no matter what my mood is. No sham, pure attitude is what makes me love him and his music. I love cleaning out my closet and Stan, but all his songs are amazing. I worship you lord!

but how dare you try to take what you didn't help me to get, you selfish bitch, I hope you fuckin' burn in hell for this shit, remember when Ronnie died and you said you wished it was me, well guess what, I am dead, dead to you as can be...

  1. In the endLinkin Park, the whole song makes sense to me. I tried so hard and got so far, but in the end it doesn’t even matter…

  1. Kiss from a rose – Seal - I heard this line ‘You became the light on the dark side of me.’ And I died! The song is mesmerizing… nothing else! My eyes become large and,
    The light that you shine can be seen

  1. ABBA – I have been a huge huge Abba fan since childhood… so whatever their songs may be I just loved singing their songs..i still do!

  1. Chupke Se – Saathiya.. Gulzar nipping out magic through his pen. Can you better this???

Farvari ki sardiyon ki dhoop mein
Moondi moondi ankhiyon se dekhna
Haath ki aad se
Neemi neemi thand aur aag mein
Haule haule maarwa ke raag mein
Meer ki baat ho

  1. Have you ever really loved a woman – Bryan Adams has got this one right! The song makes me melt and how. The lyrics are fluid… they crawl over my skin and clamp onto my head like an octopus grabs it prey. When you see her unborn children in her eyes….Beautiful alliance of words and music.

  1. Father Figure – George Michael – Waste of a man! But what a song this is. Sensuality personified. Lyrics and music that can teleport you to a different level all together. All time favorite. So when you remember the one’s who have lied, who said that they cared but left as you cried…

  1. Maa – Taare Zameen Par – the one and only song that got tears to my eyes when I heard it. And that happens practically every time I hear it. Bhej na itna duur mujhko tu..yaad bhi tujhko aana paun maa.

  1. Chhoti Si Kahani Se – Ijaazat – Na Jaane kyu…dil bhar gaya… na jaane kyu… aankh bhar gayi…Gulzar…!!! I have nothing to say here.

  1. Tujhse Naraz Nahi – Masoom – Jeene ke liye socha hi nahi.. dard sambhalne honge… muskuraye to…muskurane ke…karz utarne honge…

  1. Khabar Nahi – Dostana – the new song… something about it that makes me happy always. Bubblegum song totally but I love it!

  1. Aaj phir jeene ki tamanna hai – Guide – the song as legendary as the movie itself. Waheeda Rehman looking stunning and dancing to the song like it was her own story!

  1. Bol Na Halke – JBJ – Gulzar! Ghoonghat hi bana lo roshni se noor ke! ….Kitne dino se yeh aasma bhi soya nahi hai…isko sula de!

  1. Jaane Kya Baat Hai – Sunny – Amrita Singh singing on TV and Sunny Deol innocently looking… the visuals flash on my mind instantly. Neend nahi aati…badi lambi raat hai!

  1. Mitwa – KANK – I love this song for some strange reason. I love the way SRK spreads his arms in this song and sings it… I love everything about it… ‘ teri nigahen, paa gayi rahein..par tu yeh soche jaun na jaun… yeh zindagi jo hai naachti to… kyu bediyon mein hai tere paaon!

There are obviously a lot more and I will keep adding them time and again…. You can post you favorites… a song…lyrics… situations or just about any reason for liking a song!

Wednesday, May 20, 2009

The teacher called Life!

Everything happens for a reason. Nothing is by chance or your luck. Every action and reaction is well calculated somewhere in the cosmos and we are only purely executing it unwittingly. There is nothing that can be left to chance. I don’t believe in chance, fate, luck, and destiny or in any other word from this family because it doesn’t exist. It is either your hard work or someone else’s that makes or breaks things in your life.

Ever since I was a child, I would rationalize in my mind why certain things went wrong. And when they did, they mostly were followed by repercussions that taught me something. Every incident, good or bad, has something to teach us. When it’s good it’s easy to decipher. But when it’s a bad incident or offshoot, we often get busy crying and mulling over it rather than knowing what it actually wants to teach us. There is always a solution to every problem. There is always an alternate road to every broken path. Life is the best teacher according to me.

Every experience that we go through in life has such a deep yet subtle sublime lesson. Everything happens for a reason. It’s such a vast topic I don’t know which one point to pick to start. I remember, when I got bad marks or didn’t score as much, my parents would whine and my friends would mock at me, but deep down inside, I believed, this is not my path…studies is not what I want to do. So the dropping result graph kept re-assuring me that I was made for something else. One time, we were given an essay to write in school for our English subject. I don’t know how others wrote, but I wrote with my heart into it. I had never written with so much care and attention. A passage that was 3 pages long…. I was stunned when the whole class clapped for me. And this was just the next day after I got punished for not finishing my homework.

Small little things hint towards big results that we don’t know yet. The most interesting chapter of life is ‘people’. Every soul that comes into our lives has a purpose. We may choose to ignore it but cannot erase it. Even when a deluge of people is around you there may be one, who would have a purpose of being there… A book I read some time back by Mitch Albom ‘ Five people I met in heaven’, brought a smile to my face because the book says exactly what I mean here. We often ignore the people whom we come across in life. Either they are irrelevant or inconsequential. But our brain is not foresighted, so it only retains information that it finds is relevant for now. So the people we meet, the action we do are all an offshoot of the way our brain reacts. If you don’t exist for me now, you don’t exist at all! But that’s not true. Someone somewhere will cross our paths again. Haven’t we all come across situations in life where we met somebody for a short while and many years later met again in strange situations?! Don’t we all say ‘The world is a small place’! So isn’t it true that every soul has a purpose.


Everybody I have met has taught me something, good or bad. Whether it is making new friends, letting go of old, meeting complete strangers and reunion with the lost! This one person who taught me how to love yourself, one friend who showed me how beautiful life is. One amazing human I met on the strangest journey’s to Bangalore who taught me how to smile your problems away no matter how big and gory they may be. One friend who taught me to live life king size even when he was broke. He showed me little joys of life that did not need you to be rich with money, but rich at heart. My aunt taught me generosity, my cousin who showed me how to dress well and flaunt! So many friends who taught me what friendship is, even when I was a difficult person to put up with! These are the obvious ones!


But the real lessons you learn from people who are totally obscure. The beggars on the street, I have not seen a single frowning face ever. They may be God’s deprived children, but they don’t even know what they are blessed with. PEACE! No fuss in life coz they are so away from all the stress of it. This one boy I saw in Bandra who apparently lost his left hand in the train blast was working in a hotel serving food! Before that he was working in an MNC in their housekeeping earning well. That’s fighter spirit for you.


I owe a lot to life, for teaching me things that my text books forgot to teach me. I owe it to all the people who have touched my life by existing in it and being a part even if they were in the crowd. The five people I’d like to meet in heaven would be –

- My Mother, I have some questions to ask

- Charu, coz I will need her everywhere

- My friend Atul, for inspiring me, always

- My great grandfather, whose valiance I have only heard about.

- this one man, who I choose not to name, to settle a score up there!

I believe that everything happens for a reason. People change so that you can learn to let go, things go wrong so that you learn to appreciate them when they're right. You believe lies so you eventually learn to trust no one but yourself...and sometimes good things fall apart so better things can fall together.

Marylyn Monroe

Monday, May 11, 2009

Jhoom Le!

Jhoom Le... saare gham bhool ke... jhoom le...

She doesnt remember the lyrics clearly, but this is what is lingering in her for the past 48 hours. Any specific reason why? Yes.... these are the lyrics of the first ever ad film she shot! No ordinary story my friends... it's genuinely a dream come true. A lebanese telecom giant, comes to India to shoot a bollywood routine with even bigger giants like Farah Khan in the director's seat, Ravi Chandran who makes it all look so good on screen and Omung Kumar the hand behind the fab set... and one new AD among 2 experienced one's...running around the sets trying to make some sense out of the controlled chaos...that's me!

My first ad shoot with with such big names is something i will remember for the rest of my life. I was handling costumes and Ashima who was the chief AD is the most charming and helping AD you'd find around here. Pierre was a darling, he virtually handheld me through the shoot, sweetly telling me how to give claps, how to deal with people, how to always avoid being around a temperamental director and tips that i will remember for life! I was like a total novice! No clue about anything that was happening. Doing what was asked from me. I was totally lost in the madness on the set enjoying every moment. I ran up and down two floors some 20 times, but every drop of sweat that ran down my cheek felt like it was blocking me so the sun won't stop me.... every time my name was called i felt like i existed... everytime i did my job well i felt i achieved something... everytime my feet twinged i knew i had more distance to cover and i have chosen the right path... everytime the wind blew dirt in my hair it meant i would wash it all off and be readier tomorrow! I may have looked like a total tart on day one but i picked up on day two and day three i was proud of myself to have understood a lot and found my ground finally!

Roll camera... action! All this was music to my ears... those blindling lights... that flurry to give the clap on time... getting yelled at and yet being given responsibility... it all felt so good! When the lights went off after pack up...i din't want to leave the set! This is what i want to do so how can it end so soon! But thankfully... i have another experience lined up soon.

I frankly had no idea this was so easy... had i known this before, i would have come much earlier.... but Jalal saab said once ' Bindu ki maa...jab jab jo jo hona hai tab tab so so hota hai'.... i can't control time and surely not my fate! But i am glad to be one of the few handpicked lucky ones to get to work with such big names always on my firsts! Such is life...

Monday, May 04, 2009

Har Jagah Khuda Hai!

SV Road, Lokhandwala, 7 bunglows, Santacruz, Khar, Bandra, Mahim, Dadar, Malabar... हर जगह खुदा है। जहाँ नही खुदा वहाँ हम खोद देंगे। पूरे मुंबई में मानो खोद खोद के भगवान ढूंढ रहे हो।

Just last week i had to replace the suspension of my car and we all know it doesnt come cheap. Whatever may be the cost involved it can be paid up, what about the nuisance and stress that it creates? Who would and how to compensate for that? Although my office is 10 mins away from where i live, every morning i have to do a painstaking 25-30 min drive to work thanks to the metro rail, underground cabling, sewer pipelines and road leveling all happening together. I wonder how so many people and departments wake up all together and dig the whole city up at the same time without thinking of the convenience and safety of the commuters.

On the link road, i remember, this one big machine pulley tilted and fell on a rickshaw killing a man in the auto. It was on plump Andheri - Versova link road. Heaviest traffic for all who travel that patch every day. One bump after the other, ducking vehicles, auto rickshaws and then potholes... i feel no less than a Schumacher when i touch down at office. Its like winning a task, completing a challenge or winning a war... the feeling is transcendent!

The roads magically get dug up and take their own sweet time to reach completion like we have zillion years of life each. Who gives them the permit to dig up roads whenever, where ever and however they want to? Honestly the most amount of inconvenience is caused to us and we go through all the trouble, stress and long grueling drives with the 43* sun above our heads on roads, we should be asked before digging up any road! Go by what majority says if there is no other way of getting permits. Or atleast pls check if any locality or road in about 400 mtrs area is dug up already. Slight planning. We wouldn't mind if there is some method to the madness. One by one, systematically... good lord not all together. Today i discover a chor-gali to escape the main road traffic and tomorrow that is dug up too! Gimme a break ya... don't test our patience. As it is auto rickshaws are enough trouble on road to convert us to formula one champs.

इस देश में वाकई हर जगह खुदा है !